Why is life unfair sometimes? Why does it takes turns like this, sharp turns that take those we love away from us too soon?
While we know death is a certainty for us all, it’s so unfair when it comes to those who are too young to leave this earth.
My friend Alan was 55 and while he had been through 5 back surgeries over the last several years, he was a fighter and an inspiration. His passing was not expected as he had been recovering well from his last surgery in November.
I remember, a few days after he returned home from the hospital, I was at his house telling him about a blog post I had written that day. It was about how being in business for one’s self is like learning to ride a bike.
After describing my analogy to him, Alan’s response was “Debra, life is like learning to ride a bike.” He went on to explain how sometimes his pain would be so great he couldn’t ignore it. He’d wake up, didn’t feel good & would allow himself to be depressed and wallow in “Why me? Why has life dealt me this card?”
Alan said he gave himself permission to go to that dark place for a day or maybe two. Then, he’d say “it’s time to get back on the bike”and he’d return to making the best and most of each day. He was an inspiration.
Right now, there’s a heaviness in the hearts of those Alan loved – his wife, sister, nieces and friends (of which he had many). However, he left us with a gift – the gift of love and connection.
In these last 9 days many of Alan’s friends who knew each other’s names, but never met, have now come together and discovered an incredible bond that will result in everlasting friendships with one another.
While Alan’s spirit shines among us, our hearts are filled with love for him, his wife and one another.
Why does life throw us curve balls? Perhaps to wake us up, remind us to appreciate all we have and the beauty that surrounds us – beauty in people, in nature, and the small little things we may take for granted.
Today is the memorial service to honor Alan and celebrate his life as that is what he’d want us to do. Turn to someone you love today, wrap your arms around them, and let them know you’re grateful to have them in your life. E ho`omaha me ka maluhia – rest in peace my dear, sweet friend.